Arriving at the board and meeting the charge nurse, she tells me we have a new traveler who will be with me for the day, Alesha. I am pumped; another traveler is like getting another soldier with you to fight the fight daily against surgeons and staff who hate us for making more money them. I am overly zealous introducing myself to her, with her giving me a reserved “hey” side eye with resting bitch face. I spent the first few minutes walking her around, and showing her all the operating rooms, and where the equipment is. Alesha adding as minimum as possible to the conversation, I think she hates me. I am determined to kill her with kindness.
We make it through morning breaks, and are at lunch, I offer to walk with her to the cafeteria, and she begrudgingly agrees. Making small talk, about home life and history in nursing. Determined to find one angle that I can bond with her over. We have children relatively close in age; I will use that as a tactical advantage. She gives as little as possible, and I am assuming she is either shy, or does in fact hate me. Getting through lunch and spending the evening doing cases together not as much time for small talk. Although I’m fairly certain she strategically placed her rolling stool as far from me as possible.
Once the day is done, we are setting up rooms for the next day, and that’s when the bond begins to form. Room by room me giving her all the unfiltered assessment on the staff members who are given nick names, motion light matt-only working when someone walks past, kitkat Nikki-always on break, E.T. Ashely-always wants to go home. I finally get her to laugh, enjoying the casual banter. Telling her which doctors to avoid, and the way the system works around here in terms of staff doing easy cases, and the travelers being screwed over at any moment because we are really not people in their eyes so don’t ever let your guard down.
Each day, enjoying more and more of Alesha, realizing that she is in fact just shy, and has had the unfortunate experience of her skin color being used against her in her life. Which leaves me crushed, hating that people in this world would go around and damage anyone else based off their skin color. Leading me down deep dive thoughts of how this could change someone, how it will affect her children, and mine as well. Hoping my children would always look at a person’s soul, their behavior and that being the basis of all treatment of each other in this world.
Wishing there was a way I could restore faith in goodness in the white person in Alesha’s world but also being aware that Alesha’s perspective is still valid to this very day. That a Saturday morning with her son at the soccer field can quickly turn into a trashy white person showing my best friend how disgusting people can be in this world. How do you battle against that? Against an absolute horrible perspective in life, that people go around not only hating people for their skin color but just hating people in general. What is wrong in someone’s soul to think it would be appropriate to spit towards a young child as they run and play along the soccer field?
I love letting my friend vent to me about her frustrations, as sad as it makes me to hear, I believe her experience, and it educates and keeps me informed on just how far humanity must go to heal. How I pray for her sons, that they never experience the hate Alesha did in for formative years. The cornerstone of their personality doesn’t always have to be in defensive mode based on racial profiling. That instead they get to be creative, explore their world with curiosity, and don’t find themselves blogging about their racial suffering at the hands of people determined to show the ugly of people.
I spent a year growing and working with Alesha, and she is very special to me. That is in fact the hardest part of traveling, finding your Alesha, and having only a one-year commitment. Alesha you make me a better person. Thank you for opening my mind up to show me what I have never experienced so that I can be educated and compassionate enough to meet you where you are in life. Till we cross paths again.